It's a Happy Thanksgiving!

Yesterday was my first appointment with my Moffit Oncologist. She had the results from last week's scans. My stomach churned all the way there. WHAT would I say, WHAT would I do if they found cancer somewhere else in my body? "Don't fall apart, hold steady....Lord give me peace, I need peace whatever the results are... whatever it is, it's beatable...." 

The waiting room was surreal. I felt like I was outside my body looking around at everyone. A kerchiefed lady, a young woman, two couples, chatting.... I watched the weather. What would it be like for Thanksgiving?? I thought about seeing my sister from NC again, cranberry sauce and...there goes my healthy eating!  I take so many herbs and supplements and eat so much organic greens, and drink so much juiced carrots and such that I don't even know if I can stomach traditional Thanksgiving dinner!

Dr. Khan (haha The WRATH of Khan, the movie) was nice enough. But she somehow missed the fact that I had already had a lumpectomy! She was talking about this trial that I could be in for triple negative breast cancer women... yada yada yada...  I finally flat out said, "THE SCANS, WHAT DID THE SCANS SHOW?"  She looked at the paperwork and said, "Nothing, we found nothing else."
I smiled. whew. Thank you God. 
Then she said I was stage 2A.  "WHAT??  You found nothing else, My tumor was removed and the nodes were negative, so HOW can I be Stage 2A? "   She said, "Your tumor was 2 1/2 centimeters when measured at the lab. Anything over 2cm is a Stage 2A, even if lymph nodes are negative."  UMMMM
''HOW Did it get to be so big!? It was 1.5 centimeters in the radiology films!"  She said sometimes their off, and sometimes they grow!!

Then she proceeded to tell me that she wanted me to have chemotherapy every two weeks. Because my type of cancer comes back in 5-10 years according to studies of other women, who have blazed the cancer trail before me--50% of the time, unless you do chemo. Then it's lowered to about 15% recurrence. hmmmmm   Guess I better do it then if I want to be around in 10 years! 
Every two weeks, instead of every three, to ZAP it good. 
"But Doctor Khan, I explained, you don't understand my lifestyle. I can't be sick and throwing up. I have six kids to take care of. Four of my own crazy boys, and two medical foster children. And my son is getting married Dec. 12th, and I have 100 farm animals.... and I get anxiety when I'm nauseaus!!!"  She said I'd have medications to thwart all that off and I"d be fine. (I've heard the stories, so I don't believe it.) 
She also said I could wait until Dec. 14th to start. NO harm will be done. YAY!  She is anxious to see the results of my Brca genetic testing that I will have done Dec. 1st. That will tell us if I carry the cancer gene mutation.

  I am not looking forward to this VALLEY I must cross with chemo. But life was never promised to be easy and I am optimistic that this will be a valley of hope! God will see me through.

THE HEALING GARDEN! That's the name of the newly planted flower garden on my tiers out front. I know I won't feel like planting when I'm going through chemo on most days, so NOW is better.

Now onto MOM-- Mom just had her MRI today, but no results yet of course. I spoke to my oncologist about her, and she is wanting her to be sure to keep the appointment for a "2nd" opinion at Moffit on Dec. 1st. She said that MOM could be in the clinical trial of such and such, yada yada....
If we get a totally different opinion at Moffit as compared to Morton Plant for MOM, we might need a third!!! Ay vay!  MOM continues to be positive and laugh with me about our unusual plight and
timing--- laugh much -love much- and dance like no one is watching- and may I add... sing karaoke often! 
GOD IS GOOD AND REMAINS OUR CONSTANT ROCK.
                   HAVE A HAPPY THANKSGIVING!